Monday 31 January 2011

Oh yes.  Haha, very funny, theatre gods...

Stepping out onto the stage for my last scene tonight, my beautiful gown snagged on one of the flowers that have throughout the production sprung up to adorn the stage. 

Unfortunately these tulips come not as single spies but in batallions.  Catch on one, and you have forty following you around with a nasty metallic screech.  

One of those eternal moments on stage when time slows and you think calmly, well I'm not going to be able to get to him with all these blasted flowers in tow, and he's already given my cue sentence and is standing there Being Bereft, so my only alternative is to untangle myself, ignoring all the laughter from the public, murmur a few holding sentences, and hope for the best.  

Once the deflowering was successfully achieved,  however, I found it hellishly difficult to keep a straight face.  This is unfortunately the ONLY serious scene I have in the entire evening - any other bit and I could have laughed and thrown out a witty comment.  But nooooo.  Had to be the earnest bit.  All the little muscles around my mouth were writhing and jiggling, desperate to make me giggle.  And a slight inquisitive raising of the tenorial eyebrow on the "private" side nearly did me in for good (anyone who asserts that Germans have no sense of humour has evidently never worked with this guy.  Hilarious in rehearsal, and a constant menace as far as making me corpse goes onstage).

I am proud to say I got through with a suitably serious expression on my (gently wobbling) face, and saved the belly laughter until I could get off stage and join in with the delighted howls from the stage manager and assistant director...

Still.  Keeps us on our toes, which (despite being horribly embarrassing in the moment) is never a bad thing!

PS the poster in the photo was a jewel which I saw when out auditioning somewhere, can't remember quite where.  Italian circus, German audience, "English" tagline... glorious!

1 comment:

  1. That really is a very lovely use of 'deflowering'. Wonderful!

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